“Fucking and sucking and touching/Fucking and sucking and touching/Fucking and sucking and touching” “He took a shit in the bathroom tub/And fed the dog brownie drugs/Tried hard not to get caught/He fucked a chick in the parking lot” Or maybe they just have a pretty unconventional relationship with grandpa. “When you fucked grandpa did he tell you that he loved you?/Did he hold you till the sun did rise and did he look into your eyes/And ask you to fellate him, and stick a finger or two in his ass” How would you like it if your scummy grandkid told the world about your bowel trouble? “It’s Labor day and my grandpa just ate seven fucking hotdogs/And he shit shit shits his pants/He’s always fucking shitting his pants”Ī bit unfair on grandpa, this. Oh no, wait, we’ve never, ever, ever been there. “And I’ll never talk to you again/Unless your dad will suck me off/I’ll never talk to you again/Unless your mom will touch my cock/I’ll never talk to you again/Ejaculate into a sock” Verse 1 I never thought I'd die alone I laughed the loudest, who'd have known I trace the cord back to the wall No wonder, it was never plugged in at all I took my time, I hurried up The choice. “Forgive our neighbour Bob, I think he humped the dog”Īre you sure it was Bob? Because going on previous form, we have every right to assume it was you guys. “He wants to bone, this I know/She is ready to blow” Her makeup and her fake tits are her choice. “Her volume of makeup/Her fake tits were tasteless” “With green eyes and long blonde hair/She wasn’t wearing underwear” But still – why don’t they step in and say something, rather than moaning into their Bud Lite? To be fair, Blink are slagging off nasty jocks here – so it’s not them out date raping people at a house party. “Far from people I hate/Down from anywhere state/Trying to intoxicate girls/To give them head after the party”
All the Jif in the world won’t help with the aftermath of that. This one’s gross mainly because of the image of the barenaked butt of a man on a sofa. “We started making out/And she took off my pants/But then I turned on the TV”
They’re for, you know, being human and stuff. This is probably the animal kingdom’s revenge for fucking that dog. “Smoked a bong, killed a cat/Had my nuts attacked by rats” And on top of that, all you’ve got to look forward to when they come back off tour is a micropenis. You’d have to put up with all manner of nonsense. Imagine going out with someone in Blink-182. “Yeah, my girlfriend takes collect calls from the road/And it doesn’t seem to matter that I’m lacking in the bulge”
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